Sipho's Lovely Letter P

So people have been asking about my work at the group home for HIV infected/affected kids. Here's the skinny: about a dozen kids up to age 8 live in this group home supported by the Anglican diocese and other churches. Some are HIV-positive, others have parents who are, most were removed by the state (whatever their version of Children's Protective Services is) because they weren't being properly cared for. They stay at the home up to two years, ideally being placed with adoptive parents or reunited with rehabilitated birth parents at some point in the process, very much like foster care in the U.S. I go there four days a week for six or seven hours a day. I help with general care, but more specifically tutoring the 5-7 year olds, who are school-aged but not in school. This leads us to the week's big victory: I taught Sipho to write his name! And he is only 3! He writes his S properly every time, which leads me to believe he is dyslexic, since little kids never get their S's straight. Sipho is what would be considered Bantu, or black, and he speaks Afrikaans, like all the children and caretakers at the home, but when he does speak English, it's the Queen's English. So it throws me off when he turns and says earnestly, "Is it a proper S? Must I practice?" Sipho is one of my favorites. I got a little annoyed the other day when one of the caregivers was admiring his name, but then tried to improve it, i.e. "your P shouldn't be as tall as your H, and you must make the tail longer." I'm like, HEY, he just learned what a P *is*, and that it makes a sound, and how to write it, and that he has one in his name. Back off, it's been a big day. I said, "It's a *lovely* P, Sipho, a *marvelous* P." He stood by the blackboard chanting to himself, "Lovely, lovely letter P, Sipho's lovely P."

The arm babies are Ipondo, Abu, Jason and Christopher; Candy is 2; Wendell and Sipho are 3; Chad is 4; Julian, Crissy and Ctaum (pronounced Stohm, such a cool name) are 5, and Ani and CarRlo are 7. Is that a typo, you ask? It may be, I haven't figured it out yet. That is how CarRlo writes his name, and he has some problems with his letters (we have just learned to consistently distinguish a 6 from a P). However, I have known my share of kids with innovatively spelled names, full of apostrophes and capital letters, which translated to Brandon or Tiffany, so who am I to say that's not exactly what CarRlo's mom had in mind? CarRlo he writes, so CarRlo he is.

A couple of observations: 1) AIDS meds have gotten so much simpler since I was dosing Juwan 6 times a day several years ago. Now it's just once or twice a day. 2) These kids' biggest problem isn't that they have HIV; it's that they haven't got stable homes or access to decent education. Even a good group home is an abnormal situation, because the caregivers are paid; it's not a family. When the babies cry, they tell me not to pick them up, because there's nothing wrong with them, they just want to be held. I would argue that that is developmentally appropriate for babies. The caregivers (who, to be fair, are very affectionate with and fond of the kids) say they won't get anything done if they are toting babies all day, and the kids will get spoiled. Kim, tell your mom I can hear her voice saying disdainfully, "Fruit spoils; children don't spoil." So I teach Sipho to write his name and work with CarRlo on B and D while bouncing Candy or rocking Abu. I think babies should be held. Life is tough enough, eh?

I'm sure as the days go by I'll have more musings and observations on South African society and HIV and available resources vs. need, but for now, there's your cast of characters.